As I struggled with a decision, something happened that I found hard to ignore. I randomly
skipped to a page in a book I am reading, that talks about letting go
of friendships that have played their course. For someone who never gives up on
friendships, I was not sure I even wanted to read this chapter, but decided to
anyway. It was eye-opening to say the least, as it fit right into what I was feeling
at the time. During lunch with friends on the same day, someone brought up FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out), and the discussion reinforced my feelings.
We say “yes” to many things that don’t make us happy. They don’t
necessarily make us sad, but they are really situations you find yourself a
part of just because the alternative is “missing out”.
“One of the simplest ways to stay happy is letting go of the
things that make you sad”
If I don’t attend that dinner, I will “miss out” on seeing
all the people I only get to see a couple of times a year. If you only see
these people a couple of times a year, and don’t see them, speak to them or in
any way, interact with them except for that dinner, is that relationship
valuable?
“At some point, you have to realize that some people can
stay in your heart but not in your life”
If I don’t go to that networking event, I will “miss out” on
meeting new people. I don’t have enough time to get to know better the people I
met at past networking events. If I continue to see people on my social network
profiles who I can’t even remember meeting, is attending one more event going
to create a stronger network?
“A big part of letting go is recognizing when it is time to
stay in a situation and when it is time to move on”
If I don't attend the upcoming baby shower of friends, I
will “miss out” on the events in their life? Considering that we only learned
of the engagement, wedding, pregnancy, and all other events in their lives
through common friends, is it not enough that we learn about the rest of their
lives in the same way?
“Letting go does not mean you stop caring, it means you stop
trying to force others to”
Today, I said no to the networking event that will be of no
further benefit to me as none of the people in that room will remember me and
reach out to help me. I also said no to being part of a baby shower that we are
invited to only because our common friends don’t know how to exclude us. And I
will say no to that dinner to which I am invited in the future where once
again, I will make small talk with people who will not remember me until the
next dinner.
To say no with confidence, I also let go……
Well Said!!
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